Success on Someone Else’s Clock | The Rick H. Show | Ep. 235

What if the reason you feel behind… is because you’re measuring your life against someone else’s timeline?

In this episode of The Rick H. Show, Rick Hierro opens up about the pressure of feeling late in life—late in career goals, late in purpose, late in success, and late in becoming the person you thought you’d be by now.

Through honest reflection and personal experiences, Rick talks about the dangerous habit of comparison, the weight of expectations, and how easy it is to believe everyone else is moving forward while you’re standing still.

This conversation explores identity, self-worth, and the uncomfortable season where nothing seems to make sense—but growth is still happening behind the scenes.

Because maybe being stuck isn’t failure.

Maybe you’re building something that requires more time.

If you’ve ever questioned your timeline, doubted your progress, or felt pressure watching everyone else win… this episode is for you.

Success doesn’t expire.
Purpose doesn’t follow a schedule.
And your life doesn’t have to happen on someone else’s clock.

🎙️ EP. 235 — Success on Someone Else’s Clock

Because feeling behind doesn’t mean you’re lost.
It might mean your story is unfolding exa

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Transcript

0:57

Welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome to another episode of the Ray Gate Show, episode 235. Today's episode is called Success on Someone Else's Clock. Now, everybody goes through this, right? Everybody goes through the feeling of, you know, are they falling behind? Are they where they're supposed to be or where they they need to be? Uh, because of the timeline that society dictates on to them. Um, have you ever felt like you've been falling behind? This is that episode. So let's start off with the title, right? Success on someone else's clock, right? Me, for example, I'm 41 years old, where I am in my life. You know, I have friends who are in different stages and stages in their lives. Now, what I learned in the process of growth is to never dictate where my life should be because of where others' lives are currently, right? Um, first I needed to define what success meant to me, and I needed to define what happiness meant to me. And you know, sometimes people work at different paces, and time is a weird thing because timing is everything, right? You could get an excellent opportunity, but it'd be a wrong time or the wrong timing for it. Like let's say I got a job interview at Spotify to produce shows for them, right? If it ain't my time, it ain't my time, right? I know obviously I'm gonna go full steam ahead and try to get that, but there's always a lesson in everything, right? If it isn't my time, I'm not gonna sit there and say, oh, you know, I didn't get it or wallow in it, right? It's not my moment and it's not my time now. That's how I view it, right? Maybe I'm not ready for this opportunity right now because maybe the universe knows I'm not mentally prepared to handle that job. Although I think I might think so myself. Maybe by me not getting that imaginary job we're discussing right now, it creates a different level of drive and motivation within me. Where I start my own um company. Right? So as I got older, I realized that was something that um I needed to get rid of. I needed to get rid of judging my life on the life of others. I needed to get rid of, as I mentioned in the previous episode, what others thought of me and giving that too much um thought and time uh and validity. Like where I am now in life, I could care less. I march to the beat of my own drum. I do things how at my pace and how I want to do them. Um, and my definition of success is completely different from other people's definition of success. To me, success is having again time to do things that I want and to create memories and spend time with those who I want. Um because you could be multimillionaire, multi-billionaire, but if you don't got time to enjoy that, then you're gonna be miserable. And there's a lot of billionaires that are unhappy. So I equate success with personal uh satisfaction and gratification, also happiness is in there for me. Um, if I'm not happy and it's not something I'm driven to do, then I might it might not be successful. So, yes, when I was younger, oh you know, you know, I'm gonna use the name Jose. I'm not not referencing any Jose's I know. Oh, Jose is you know making X amount of money per year, he works at this company and he's he's engaged to this person or X, Y, and Z, whatever it may be. That's Jose's timeline, that's his road, that's his path. Mine wasn't like that, you know. Um, Jose probably was ready for that at that moment in time. And if let's say he's 24, I'm 24, me knowing who I was at 24, I was definitely not ready for what Jose was doing, right? I wasn't in the right state of mind, I wasn't I didn't figure out who I was, I wasn't comfortable and confident in myself at that moment in time. Um, and there was a lot of lessons that I needed to learn. So if you ever feel like you're falling behind, which it's human nature, everybody goes through it. Um just replay this episode, or just remember that that everybody's on a different path and at a different speed of the way things are going. You know, there's people that are younger than me that financially they might be more successful than me, and I'm not envious of that situation, I'm happy for them. You know, I know a lot of younger people who I went to St. John's with that are doing excellent with their professional life. Now, that's just one small piece of the puzzle. I don't know how everything else is going for them, but um if you ever felt that way, this is the discussion to have with yourself, right? Uh, what inspired me to make this episode? Well, I felt like it was the next um the next topic I needed to discuss. Everything's been been connected so far from reset to no blueprint to um uh the person I had to leave behind, which was the last episode, and then lined up next topic would be this one. So um, and I've been through this and I've felt all of this, so it was something that I could speak to and have experience on. So that's what made me feel like I needed to do this episode. Why do so many of us feel pressured to have life figured out by a certain age? Uh is many, many external influences that bring that type of pressure onto someone is never so it's never you yourself per se. It's always friends, family, society, the community you're in, whatever you're doing. Um the the um career path that you're in that always um make you feel that pressure or that um puts you in that state of mind where you feel like you're falling behind or you're not where you should be. Um which it's a good tool for motivation, but not to um like the pressure from that world, it's a good tool to like okay, you should always surround yourself with people who are doing better and who are gonna push you, which is a good thing. So, Jose, I I see Jose, what Jose is doing, and you're like, Man, I need to get to that point, or I need to get to that spot, so I need to figure things out for myself. That's how you should view that situation. Unfortunately, the normal person doesn't view it that way, the normal person views it in a way where, like, damn, I'm not there, and then they go into this pitfall of thoughts in their mind that could lead into depression and could lead into um doubt in yourself, you're it could lead into deterioration of your self-worth, could lead into a lot of things. Um, but hopefully you have someone in your circle that could pull you to the side and say, Hey, just because that person is where they are, it doesn't mean you need to be at that point. Maybe you are not ready to be at that point, so um, that's where we get that external uh pressure from. Who created the timeline and how do you measure it? I mean, it's it's I feel like each generation has a different expectation for um every other generation, like my generation. We got married in our later years, we had kids in our later years, generation before me did it, they did it earlier. Um, it just depends on the expectations from the previous generation and how the next generation deals with it and handles it, right? Uh, that's where those timelines come about. And what does success mean to you today compared to before? To me, before success was uh, you know, success. A lot of people tie it to money, they tie it to uh you know, some tie it to materialistic things. For me personally, I feel like success is that you have a career that you're passionate about and you're working hard at, um, and you try to win every day, uh, and you try to improve every day. Success also means that you are happy with yourself and you're comfortable and confident in yourself. Success means that you have people around you who love you, support you, and push you. Um, and the success is also measured by you. Like you need to constantly, in your mind, be thinking, okay, I I tackled this goal. What's the next goal? What's the next goal? And there's two sets of goals: there's the end game goal, and then there's a journey. And in the journey, there should be small goals in between that you're trying to accomplish and meet, and that's in your personal and your professional life. So that's how I measure it. Other people might have a different definition on how they measure it and how they view it, but that's just my interpretation of it. So if you agree with me, you too. If you don't, you know, it is what it is. Uh have there been moments, this is all about career at this moment in time. Has there been moments? Um, I'm sorry, let me respond. Um, have there been moments in time when you questioned your career path? Absolutely. And I don't think if you're I don't I think that if you're questioning your career path, that means you're evaluating what you're doing for a living and if you're happy, and that's a good thing. Now, if you're constantly questioning it, then maybe there's something that's that's missing out of that equation. But um, as far as career, you gotta be doing something you love, something you're passionate about, something you're gonna work extremely hard at. Because if you do those first three things, then financially you should be fine, and you'll you'll get there. And if you're doing something like you're an entrepreneur, you're starting something out, be ready to sacrifice. People say five years, I say it's more like seven years of your life to what you're doing. Um, and put that time and that work into whatever it is that you're gonna set out to do. Um, but absolutely, like if you're questioning your career path, that means you're evaluating where you are professionally. And if you find that you're doing something that you love, but the the surroundings ain't it, then that means you're on the right spot. You're just in the wrong place, right? If you if you're the surroundings ain't it, and what you're doing ain't it, then that means what you're working in is not the field for you, and maybe you should do some soul searching and figure out what it is that you're passionate about. I mean, the key to life when it comes to professionally, like a job or a career, is to do something that you love that you make a you can make a living out of, right? Um, and don't be scared to want to be, you know, like if you want to make shoes for a living, don't be scared to, I want this to be a multi-million dollar or multi-billion dollar company. Not to say that those who think like, okay, I'm making X amount of money a year, I'm good, I'm uh I'm content, is a bad thing, but you always got to make sure your end goal always scares the hell out of you. So um, yeah, the where you're at, the location you're working, the people you're working ain't it, but you're passionate about what you're doing, then maybe a changing company. But if both things ain't it, what you're doing, and the people, then maybe it's just like a career change. So that's how I uh I look at um that, and as someone who has had all the jobs, trust me when I say all the jobs, and worked in a ton of different companies and tried and tried and tried and tried to figure out at first. When you're young, you're gonna try to fulfill the expectations of others and uh the ones that others put on to you, right? Uh, when you're growing up, usually your parents want you to be something specific, like a lawyer, doctor, policeman, whatever it is, and and and you make an attempt to that. But if you've really not, if your heart is not in that, then that is not for you, right? Um, obviously, you're also gonna go for things that um, like I I wanted to play for the Knicks, but that takes a certain amount of skill and talent that I did not possess and size. So I I tried to pursue that, and obviously that's not gonna work. So it's a process of figuring yourself out, figuring out what you love and what you're passionate about. Now, I couldn't play for the Knicks, but I am very damn passionate about my Knicks, and I could write and produce a show, and I could do media stuff about the Knicks and still be involved in a passion. So it doesn't necessarily mean that that's the end of the dream, right? If if you wanted to be a baseball player, shout out to my cousin Emmanuel, who's a great example of this. Emmanuel is knowledgeable, passionate, um, and is just a student of the game of baseball. And his first dream was to be a major league baseball player and have a Hall of Fame career and all that that comes with it, and he was pretty good. But then his other dream was to be inside an organization where he worked in baseball operations and he was involved in the game still, but in another aspect. So just because you're not the star, you could be a producer, director, or writer. Same thing with acting. If you're not a talented actor, but you're a great videographer or a great audio guy or great writer, or your ideas are amazing. That does not mean you cannot be involved in the uh career path that you want to be in, right? If you do not possess a certain skill, but you're passionate about something, you got to figure out where you're gonna make your mark and where you're gonna fit in. Um, and that's how I came up with the podcast, right? Although I love where I work and who I work with, I still had some other you know passions, especially for media. You know, when I was in college, I was involved with the radio, I was involved with the um media board, and that's always something I wanted to get back to. And I have a career, but this is something I also could have did on the side, did on my own, and I didn't need any backing, and I can make a career out of it. Now, in the eight, nine years I've been podcasting, this has opened so many doors for me and so many opportunities for me that I'd be foolish to stop doing it. So I I feel blessed to be able to have a career where I can maintain a living and um provide and also have a separate career um at the same time. So if you're not a talented athlete, and I'm saying athlete because everybody wants to be an athlete, an actor, or or famous, if you just want to be famous, then that's I I don't know what to tell you. I mean, there's roads to that, there's excuse me, other things you can do, but if you're specific about something, like I specifically am passionate about sports and certain teams, um, there's people that just want to be famous. You can be famous for the wrong things, but that's not being specific or like narrowing down exactly what you wanted to do. Um, so yeah, it's a lot of reflection and thinking. Um, but I feel like once you hit a groove and you figure things out, which believe it or not, is not the hard part. The hard part is the work you got to put in, you know, those five, seven, eight years you got to put into that career, right? Uh, a lot of friends of mine are stand-up comedians, and a lot of them are now starting to get recognized and they're becoming very famous. But I know what it took to get there, and it literally took, you know, years of open mics, years of no's, years of rejections, uh, practicing and um honing their skills and their craft, um, you know, learning crowd work, learning the crowd that you're catering to, tailoring how to figuring out how to tailor jokes uh to where you are and who you're telling those jokes to. Um, so it's not an easy thing. Uh, but those are the first two dominoes that need to fall for you. And I guarantee you, when you're on the journey, there's gonna be times where you're gonna feel like you want to quit. But if you don't quit and you keep pushing through it, you'll be able to see the fruits of your labor. It's just it things, nothing comes easy in this world, and anything that's worth something is going to take time, dedication, and hard work. And it might sound very cliche, but that is absolutely 100% true, right? Um, There are like special occasions where someone is just naturally talented, naturally given. That happens once in a generational athlete or whatever. Those things do happen. But for the most of us, where you're going through these motions where you're trying to figure out what's your career, what success means to you, and and and where you should be, and at when you should be at whatever certain point it is, it really depends on you. If you have figured yourself out first and who you are and what makes you happy, and what you want to dedicate your time to. Excuse me. You're having a good time doing this. No, I mean like you enjoy and you have a passion for it. And when I say a passion, right? And here's the competitive side of me. I've been doing this for a while, right? I know I'm not the number one, and I'm not the greatest, but I'm telling you, that's in my mind, that's what I work for. To one day be able to say, and I've won awards, I'm the best to ever do this, and that is my drive. And that is why I read books, I study, I learn applications, I watch my peers on how they do things, I absorb the information. Um, and then I figure how to make things my own and do things in my own way, in my at my own time, at my own pace. Um, and I don't try to do things because other people are doing them. I do things that I want to talk about and produce and write for, right? When I first created the show, I've said this on the first episode of Reset. I started booking guests just by, you know, if they were popular, if they had, you know, a presence on social media, how many followers they had, thinking that those followers would gravitate towards me and it would help me grow. And that's that's it works in some occasions, but very rarely does it. And that's the wrong way to look about it, to go about it. Um, I first should have established myself and and created my audience and figured out my whole thing, and then start collaborating with others. Now that that was my road. My road was to start the way I started, do it the way I did it, and learn the lessons that I've learned. And now I feel where I am at right now. All of that has prepared me for this moment, this year, this time, and my next three or four year run that I'm about to go on. So in summation, success shouldn't be on somebody else's clock. You should never compare yourself to somebody else's. There's always circumstances. Your situation or your um surroundings might not be the same as that person. That person might have had advantages or disadvantages that you didn't have, and that's fine. But success to me begins and starts with you learning who you are, figuring out what you want to do, and then coming up with a game plan on how to get it done. So that's what it means to me. And you gotta get rid of comparing yourself to others, and the second thing would be caring what others' opinions are. So if you can do that, you'll be fine, and you'll start to see a change and a shift in energy, and those who will support you will support you, those who be around will be around. And that's what I have to say on that subject. So uh, I want to thank for those of you who tuned in tonight or will tune in later. Uh, I appreciate it. I want you guys to engage with me. So if you want, you can send me an email, send me a DM. You can follow me at the Rick H show or at it's Rick H on Instagram. The email for the show is therihshow at gmail.com. Follow, subscribe, like, share, comment, um, and let me know your honest thoughts and opinions. Tomorrow, catch us live at 9 for the 50th episode of the 2 a.m. crew. I want to wish you all a good night. God bless, and we'll see you all next week.