The Best Version of Me Has Three Names | The Rick H. Show | Ep. 236

EP. 253 — **The Best Version of Me Has Three Names**

For years, I believed success was measured by accomplishments, promotions, recognition, and the goals I could check off a list.

Then I became a father.

And everything I thought mattered... changed.

In this deeply personal episode of *The Rick H. Show*, I reflect on how fatherhood transformed not only my life, but my identity. This isn't an episode about parenting advice—it's about becoming the kind of man my children inspired me to be.

Through stories about Jonas, Emilia, and Viviana, I share the unexpected lessons they've taught me about patience, humility, love, perspective, and purpose. Each of them has challenged me in different ways, revealing strengths I didn't know I had and flaws I could no longer ignore.

This conversation is about legacy. About showing up. About realizing that the greatest accomplishments in life aren't always found in your career or your achievements—they're found in the people who quietly change your heart every single day.

Whether you're a parent, hope to become one someday, or simply have someone who changed the way you see the world, this episode is a reminder that our greatest teachers often come in the smallest forms.

Because the best version of me...

Has three names.

Jonas. Emilia. Viviana.

Transcript

SPEAKER_03 0:57

Welcome, welcome to the show. My apologies, I already had to adjust the camera. Welcome to the Rick Gate Show. I am your host, obviously, Rick Garrow. Um, before we begin tonight's episode, I would like to um announce that we are nominated for the 10th annual Latin Podcast Awards, which the Rick Gate Show has won four priviously. Um thank you to the Academy, Felix Montelara. Uh, we always look forward to participating at the Latin Podcast Awards every year. Uh, it's a great uh award ceremony to be a part of. Um, and you get to also learn about all the other podcasters internationally. Um, and it's a great way to build a uh network. So very excited about that, very happy about that. So once again, thank you for the nomination. The 2 a.m. crew is also nominated for the LAN Podcast Awards. So there is a slight chance that you might see nominated for whatever award, the Rick A show, and it's me. And then it says the 2 a.m. crew, and it's me and Jason. So that should be interesting to watch. It's the 10th uh annual LAN Podcast Awards, it will take place in October. This year it is live from Miami, so very excited about that. Um, and let me see if there's any other house cleaning things. Uh, today is uh 626, Friday, 626. It is my son's sixth birthday. It's he actually inspired this episode. I've I've spoken about my son um years ago. I did an episode called Jonas Saves Christmas, uh, where I spoke about how adults feel about Christmas. Um I don't remember how old I was at the time, but uh when my son was born and Christmas was coming around, it gave me a new meaning and uh a new feeling about the holiday. And now I look forward to it as much as I did when I was a kid. So um today was his birthday. He turned six today. He turned six on 626, and he was actually also born on a Friday, so it's pretty cool, pretty special. Um, this current iteration of the podcast of this show has basically become like a uh vlog about my life. I'm gonna excuse me for a second while I press live on uh TikTok. So, yeah, this iteration of the show has become about me, my life, and it's like a personal journal and a personal growth. Um the first 10 episodes, like I previously mentioned, would just be uh 10 episodes I wrote out and I thought of and some subject I wanted to cover. Afterwards, I will resume interviewing other individuals and um allowing them to tell their stories. But for the reincarnation of the show, the uh this version of the show, if you will, um it's it's it's based on true stories about me and my life and where I'm at in life. And I wanted the audience to get to know me first before we continued with the interviews and everything else that we were doing. Um, so far we've launched a couple episodes that were very good. Um, they done very well. Uh reset, no blueprint. Um, the person I had to leave behind, and then there's another one. Tonight's episode is a little different because tonight's episode it was inspired. Like I said, today's my son's sixth birthday, and it was inspired by my son and my kids. And I wanted to talk about that for a second, you know. Um, I've I've been since I started writing uh episodes for this show specifically, I have been um evaluating myself, where I'm at in life, um the people around me, uh a lot of things, you know. Um where am I lacking as a person, as a human being, as a family member, as a husband, as a father, and where I need um to improve. Um because I'm gonna be honest, like not every day is sunshine and rainbows for everybody, you know. Uh you you go through a uh ups and downs of emotions, and um it is very difficult sometimes to keep a level headed, specifically when a lot of stuff is going around you uh and it's happening around you. Um you kind of want to assess the environment, the environment that you're in. Uh, by the way, excuse the this is my basement. This is uh my active basement has been for since four years now, and uh the washer and dryer are going off right now. So if you hear some background noise, uh my apologies. Normally it's quiet down here when I'm doing these shows, and the audio is is of good quality. So um, before I continue, I just want to pick up where I last left off with the Rick A show specifically. Um, I know I took a couple weeks off um of the show, and um I'll explain that to you in a second. I'm sorry, I'm I'm looking on my my phone. I should have looked this up earlier. Uh success on someone else's clock. So the last episode I did of the Rick A show is called Success on Someone Else's Clock. And that's basically discussing, you know, people measure where they're at in life by the standards of where other people are in life, and I and I think that's that's that's always been a mistake. So that's just a brief summary of that. Um, in this one, and let me see when was that? That had to be like June 1st or something like that. Yeah, it was three weeks ago. So a lot has happened in the last three weeks for me personally. Um dealt with loss, personal loss. Uh it was my birthday, vacation, the next run. Um, and I came back from vacation. And then it was my son's birthday. Oh, Father's Day, I'm sorry. And and and then it was my son's birthday. Uh June is a a month for me that I look forward to. Cause I get to it's the sixth month of the year. I yes, I was born in June, and I'm a Gemini. Let's get over all that stuff now. Um, but I feel like it's a good time, you know. It's like the seasons changing. Um Father's Day. I'm a father now. I have been. And it's my firstborn's birthday, so it's like a lot of stuff going on in my mind. Um, so this month's been specifically very hard for me. I did deal with like a loss of a family member, best friend. Um hence why it's been a while since I've done this. But since today was my son's birthday, uh I decided to talk about my three children on this specific episode. Um, there's a lot of things you realize as a parent. Um, first of all, in life you'll never stop learning. You'll learn from if you keep, I've always said this, if you keep an open mind, uh an open mind, a honest heart, and and you uh it's three things, Jesus Christ. Now I'm forgetting the third, but uh nonetheless, I I always am amazed by my three kids, right? They're they're three, they're different individually. Um they're a a blend of me and my wife. Um and I always learn from them, and I always enjoy the time that I spend with them, whether they're running around the house and destroying everything, or we're we're having a moment. I I really truly enjoy that. And they've given me something that I could never explain. I mean, if you're a parent yourself, you'll know what you know what I'm talking about. Uh, but my son turns six today, and since he's my oldest, you know, I kind of like always see where I'm at as a as a parent. My wife's phenomenal as a mother. I don't really there's nothing I would ask her to do or change about how she deals and raises our kids. But me personally, I always, you know, I don't have a handbook on this stuff, you know. I don't there wasn't someone to guide me. I did have uh father figures, and you know, my steppop was in my life for a long time, but um he worked six days a week, so uh this is all uncharted territory for me. Like I'm using people that I know as examples and stuff, so I always gauge um what I'm doing correctly and what I'm not doing correctly, and I always remind myself that you know everything I do is is good no matter what. Like it's it's it's I'm there, you know. And people say, Oh, you is it's just important just to be present. No, I I think it it is important to be present, but it's also important to be impactful and and and pass things down to them. Um so I had some questions that people submitted to me. I want to talk about all that stuff. Um, I'm gonna answer some of them. Uh I have a son and two daughters. Like I just mentioned, my son's birthday is actually today. Um and before I became a father, right? You know, um you go through stages, I got engaged, you know, engagement to me, I took it as preparation for marriage and learning how to uh be a good husband and a good partner, but nothing prepares you uh for becoming a parent. Um it just I don't know. Sometimes you find yourself reminiscing on times when a grandmother or aunt or somebody in your family says something to you, and you're like, oh my god, this is why they would say this all the time, and you're like, Oh, and you feel appreciation for those people and what they did for you. But uh, did I think first of all, I was nervous as hell to become a dad, specifically to a son. Um, I didn't know what type of father I was going to be for him. I had zero clue the day he was born. Um, I was like, I was it's a moment when you become a parent, but I in my mind I'm like, oh my god, like there's no book or no manual. Like I felt like I was already behind and I was already failing. Um you know, he's he he he he was born, and I was like, okay, so what now how do we how do we guide this? Thank God for his mom. Like she's the one that read up on things, she's the one that um was looking for developmental stuff. She's the one that um kind of like you know, I mean, she was very confident and stuff, and very she had an idea, and I just I really followed her lead and I tried to do my best. Um and it took a while for me to learn how to. I think now with a third one is where uh I feel comfortable in being in that, and and I feel comfortable knowing what to do and and and how to talk to my kids and um how to change with the ages and stages because they're they're they're different, you know. My son's six, my daughter's four, and then we have a nine-month old. So um, but they always surprise me and they always uh change my mood for the better, always for the better. Um best part of my day is coming home to them uh for like a minute or 30 seconds. They them seeing you is like the greatest thing to them, you know. Their face lights up. Uh I live for that. I live for that. I really, I truly do live for that. And um, you know, um, I see some of me and them, I see some of my wife and them. And every day all I do is I think about like, hey, how can I make sure that this person, this child, when they grow up to be an adult, does a much better job at being an adult than I did, um, and takes advantages and listens to advice, something I didn't do. Um, and is more mature and responsible uh at a younger age than I was. Um I do want them to be better than me, but I want them to be happy. Like I want them to be happy and um really confident in who they are and what they want to do with their life. Uh that would nothing in this world would make me happier than if all three of them knew that. Um so yeah, that that's that's where we're gonna start this off, this episode. Uh TikTok, if you're watching the TikTok live, um streaming on the other apps, and I just turned this on so you guys can get a glimpse. If you want to join us, join us on the YouTube. Um my three kids are definitely different, all three of them. They were born in different seasons. Uh, one was born in the summer, one was born in the winter, the other one was born in the fall. Um my son is the first, so uh everything with him is brand new. Um the fact that he's the oldest, he's going into ages and stages that we've never been to before. My daughter Emmy is she's very special. Like she very mature, very smart, knows who she is, very confident in who she is. Um has an older brother, so like we have some experience with raising a child, but it's different because she's a girl. And then just my my daughter, Viviana, she's such a happy baby. Like everybody that sees her is like, oh my god, you guys are blessed. Like your third baby, and she's like a really good baby. I'm not saying it because I'm her dad, but she is a really, really good baby. She's very happy, always smiling, um, funny, inquisitive, smart, already at nine months. Um trying to catch up to her two older siblings. Uh, they're all three of them are completely different. Like my son is very I think he's gonna be either engineer or he loves building things, putting things together, figuring out puzzles. Um uh he's inquisitive. Um he'll watch or read or try to like play with any toy. Um Emmy is different, she knows who she is. She uh like I said, she's she's a lot like her mom. And the baby, she's um, you know, she's she's nine months old, but like you could tell she's completely different from the other two, and um, she kind of feels like she's gonna be the one that like puts the glue together. She's the third one. I don't know if that's uh what happens, but you know, her brother's crazy about her, her sister's crazy, her sister's very protective and maternal of her. Her brother loves to like play with her and joke around with her. Um, so I like the fact that they already have like a nice bond with each other. And um, my son and my daughter, they're like best friends, they're very unseparable, you know. When they're alone, they're cool, they they do their own thing, and but uh they they really they Really, really get along very well. I mean, they are you, of course, because brother and sister, but uh I'm very happy that they all three of them have each other. So um I just want uh my son to be again a much more mature, responsible young man. I want him to really figure out what he wants to do with his life when he gets older. I want him to have a plan for that. Um, my daughters, I want them to also the same likewise in whatever career they want to choose in. Um I'll be there fully supportive of them. Uh and it's really like trying to give them, not give them what I didn't have, but give them better uh situations and scenarios than I had, um, but also teach them lessons that I've learned. Because I feel like when you try to give your child uh a better life than you did, um you forget to also show them some of the lessons in life's and struggles you went through because that's what shaped you. And I I feel like it turned out pretty well. I feel like, you know, I'm a good person. Um so nothing in life, um, I mean, everything I went through in life prepared me for this. So I I don't want them to feel like a sense of entitlement or like um I want them to know, you know, yes, you're growing up in a house, yes, you're going to a good school, yes, uh, but not everybody goes to that. And I want them to be humble and and have a good head on their shoulders. Realistically, that's what every parent wants. Would I ever want my kids to know about who I was when I was younger? Um, not now, but maybe when, you know, maybe when they're older, maybe when they're at a certain age, if they want to ask. I'm never when they're adults and they won't they want to ask me questions, um, and I feel like they're you know, they're set, I definitely would share who I was and some of the trials and tribulations I went through. Um, because I feel like, you know, some of the stuff I went through, they're not gonna go through, but it's good for them to know. It's good for them to know what lessons I got out of what, you know. Um just looking through. And so I feel like they've they've made me a a better person overall. And I feel like they teach me things every day, and um I feel like it's what I look forward to. It's it's my purpose, you know. Um I really, really, it sounds cheesy. When we plan stuff together, like as a family, I get so hyped about like just going because I want to see their reaction, their responses, their feedback, um, what they thought of the experience. You know, when we go on vacation or we go somewhere as a family, I want to know um if they loved it, if they hated it. You know, I really look forward to uh creating moments and spending time with them. It gives me, you know, when we have something planned, and let's say it's like two months away, my sole focus is like going through my routines and stuff, but that gives me something to look forward to. Um, and you know, my son and my daughter they're much older, so they're understanding a lot more and they're they're following things a lot better now. Like, I'll give you an example. Like, my son kept me asking me when's father's day, because he knows his birthday is right after Father's Day. So he wanted to know how much time it was uh till his birthday came. And he started like asking around May, like trying to figure out, oh, okay, so I got this much time left. I'll wait. I I I know when it's coming up. So uh, but it is cool, man. It's it's it's so cool to see like uh a better version of you in these small individuals, and uh, I'll tell you this much, they're way smarter than I was at their age, and they're way more inquisitive, and uh just the conversations that I have with them, it it surprises me every single day, like the stuff that they ask me, um uh and and the emotions that they go through, you know. So it's it's a beautiful thing. It it really is an amazing, fulfilling feeling, like um there's nothing in this world that's like it. Really, nothing. I could be, you know, I work and I commute. I could be dead tired uh coming home. And um when I see, not not every day because uh obviously we're all human, but um if they're excited to see me or there's a they're excited to tell me about something that happened in their day, and uh it's cool, man. Like it's so cool to connect with them in that level. You know. So yeah. Um are they perfect? No, no one is, but my job is to uh and my wife's job is to be there for them and guide them. Ums. They know I do a podcast, and if they watch this 20 years from now, what would they say? You know, what would they you know tell me? I don't know. I I think it'll be pretty cool where you know, as adults they watch this video and they're saying, hey, we get to get a glimpse of how dad was thinking and feeling around the time that we were growing up. And um I just want them to know that I I really do love them, that they changed my life forever. Um, that I always knew I wanted to be, I wanted my own family, I wanted to be a father, but I didn't know it was gonna be this good of a feeling. It's like when the Knicks became champions after 53 years, that's the exact feeling that I feel about my children, you know. Um so yeah, I just I just try to be honest and sincere and authentic with them. Um try to guide them, and I try to have as much fun as possible with them. Um, and I try to enjoy every second I can. Uh, I do realize that there is the the parents do make some big sacrifices, you know. I because of my demanding job, I don't get to spend as much time as I'd like with them, but uh I hope one day they realize that that's just a sacrifice I had to make and that mom had to make. Um and for that, you know, that was my responsibility, and that's mom's responsibility, but um, we do love you, all three of you, and cherish you. So yeah, um there's three better versions of me, and they all have different names. And that's Jonas, Amelia, Viviana, mommy and daddy love you. And if you watch this 20 years from now, uh, this is how I felt on Jonas's sixth birthday. To my audience, thank you for tuning in tonight. I appreciate the patience that you've had with me in June. Uh, I will try to get to a more consistent schedule with this show. Um, and I hope you all enjoy uh your summer and the festivities that are coming up. See you guys next week. The Rick A show comes on Mondays at nine o'clock. Till then, enjoy your night. And I'll see you soon.